from FemaleNetwork.com
1. I will keep all my makeup sponges clean and crud-free. After all, sponges are for putting on makeup, not mud.
2. I will keep my eyebrows groomed. Stubble is sexy on Italian men, not my brow bone.
3. I will use conditioner on my hair.
4. I will use pore strips to keep my nose whitehead-free.
5. I will get a pedicure regularly. I don’t want to look like a troll.
6. I will trim my nose hairs. Enough said.
7. I will not prick my zits. This will eventually cause scars.
8. I will throw out my old makeup. If it smells like rotten fruit, it goes into the trash.
9. I will not put makeup on while driving. It will cause uneven makeup application and possible automobile accidents.
10. I will not use face powder that is too white for my face. I am not a Japanese Kabuki actor.
11. I will have my bigote removed (In case I even come out on TV in full close up.)
12. I will get a hot oil when I need one. It’s good for the hair, it’s good for the soul.
13. I will wash and clean my hair brushes.
14. I will get a haircut every 4 to 5 weeks. I don’t want to look like an overgrown fern.
15. I will exfoliate! I do not want to be a scaly reptile.
16. I will not smoke and put on hair spray at the same time. Hair spray is so eighties, really.
17. I will put on moisturizer every night.
18. I will use sunblock even when I’m not at the beach. Rays today, raisins tomorrow.
19. I will not stop using that chocolate brown/mauve/coral lipstick from the mid-nineties.
20. I will not match my eyeshadow with my clothes.
21. I will stop wearing pink foundation. Caladryl is for itches, not for the face.
22. I will start experimenting with new makeup styles.
23. I will keep my makeup kit neat and organized.
24. I will experiment with nail colors other than beige.
25. I will shave or wax my legs when I wear a skirt or shorts.
26. I will get a bikini wax if I have to wear a bikini or swimsuit.
27. I will not straighten/curl/dye my hair every month. Stressed hair is ugly hair.
28. I will use eye cream.
29. I will immediately remove chipped nail polish.
30. I will not sleep with makeup on. Just think of the pillows and bed sheets the morning after.
31. I will exfoliate my lips and use lip balm regularly.
32. I will keep hand sanitizer handy all the time.
33. I will always have a pack of tissues with me.
34. I will stop buying the same shade of lipstick.
35. I will not wear orange eyeshadow.
36. I will buy a new bath lily or loofah when the old one looks like a dead rat.
37. I will go to the spa at least once before I’m 50.
38. I will have my teeth cleaned every six months.
39. I will clean my makeup brushes every two weeks and replace them when they fall apart.
40. I will moisturize my elbows.
41. I will stop wearing tri-color eye shadow.
42. I will exfoliate and moisturize my feet.
43. I will not wear too-thick makeup.
44. I will clean my ears at least four times a week.
45. I will consult a recent magazine to see if my makeup/hairstyle/clothes are still current.
46. I will not feel insecure because I do not look like Laetitia Casta.
47. I will not make lait the next girl because she looks better than me.
48. I will be beautiful to feel good for myself, not to please other people.
49. I will not put mashed fruits and masticated vegetables on my face.
50. I will learn to laugh at myself when I get too vain.
All comments are moderated. Your comments will not appear here unless approved by the blog owner. Thank you.